How do you know when you are being too difficult?
So, my girl friends and I were talking earlier today…you know about the usual stuff:
- getting jobs after graduation, you know, so we won’t be BrokeBetty’s
- the dreadful (trying to stay positive though) semester that is about to begin for some of us
- Donald J. Trump, and his bafoolery (of course)
- and last but not least…Men
Right in the midst of our conversation about the opposite sex, one friend quickly asked: “Hey, how do you know when you are being too difficult” on guys?
Now, I guess this question could fall under the debate of High Standards vs. Unrealistic Expectations, but I kind of feel that this debate deserve a whole separate post.
But, the difficulty on guys (whether or not we as women need to adjust our attitudes), totally depends on the clarity of the guys intentions. For me, if I perceive that a man’s intentions are off when it comes to how he approaches me, then my “difficulty” increases. Now, this is not to say that I play hard to get (in my own opinion), it is just that I am more cautious than I would be in any other situation.
The main area that I show restraint is my level of communication. Whether me and the guy (that I’m not sure about) are texting consistently or not, whenever we do communicate, there is always a boundary.
For example, when I text, I use “haha” instead of “lol” and other things of that nature. So, if I am texting someone who’s approach is wrong or off (in my opinion), there will be no excessive use of “haha” or any punctuation, just to make my “Hey, I don’t feel that we have a connection…I think that you should move on” vibe very clear.
…That Kind of sounded harsh. I guess what I should say is “Well, I’m not interested in flirting, so………. (Nevermind. They both sound harsh. Yikes)
Now, there are times when I find that (and I am told that) this approach is kind of “harsh”.
“Well, what if he was nervous?”
“What if he really likes you, but doesn’t know how to express it?”
“Well, maybe you’re not giving him a fair chance.”
…these are quotes that I hear pretty often…
So, back to the main question: “How do you know when you are being too difficult?”
… I think we “just know”…as human beings.
After a while of communication and observing his actions, the words he chooses, and what he talks about with you, I think you know whether or not a man seems genuine. I feel that if the man is genuinely interested (regardless of his approach), you’d be able to see it in his persistence. Now, I’m not saying that he will wait forever, but there will be a moment where you’ll say to yourself “Gee, well maybe I should give him a better chance”.
I believe that every woman has a Third Eye (a 6th sense, if you will)…you know, something that warns you when danger is coming, or tells you that everything is going to be OK. This Third Eye definitely kicks in, for me, when it comes to men.
But, again, back to the main question: “How do you know when you are being too difficult?”
Well, if you have to ask…then maybe you are.
Just a quick post on this Monday night. What are your thoughts? Are women too hard on men? If so, Why? Have Men given us reasons to be hard? If so, what?
** I am young, so my views may be a little naive…if so…let me know = ) **
Peace&Blessings from yesterday and beyond.